My name is Onica Jolene Attwood, and I am studying at CLI, a free online Christian college. Born and raised in Capetown, South Africa, it is also where my grandparents, my parents, and I attended the Old Apostolic Church. I studied at the International Academy of Health and Skincare where I graduated as a Health & Beauty-therapist.
Current Journey with God
I’m on a journey with God, currently learning how to become a good Christian leader at the Christian Leaders Institute (CLI). I made a few mistakes in life, but I’m so grateful God found me! My relationship and journey with God began when my local hairstylist ministered and prophesied over me. Thereafter, she invited me to church, and I went through water-baptism soon after as well.
Being a resident of the Netherlands 🇳🇱 now, I have found a passion to study again. I am so appreciative of the many opportunities to learn, study, and apply what I’ve learned at CLI. I find it easier to put into practice what I’m learning. Also, people are more open to hearing my perspective on God’s word with my education. I’ve also been given opportunities to share about several topics in some local churches. I have thoroughly enjoyed it!
It’s very safe here as opposed to South Africa, but the need is also great to learn and to understand the Bible. I sense a lack of knowledge amongst fellow believers, especially when I attended various Bible studies. I have struggled to find a place where I can find a good teacher and mentor.
Ministry Dreams
My desire is to connect to God in such a way, that I acquire the necessary knowledge, wisdom, and skills to build a church in my country of South Africa 🇿🇦. My aim is to reach and teach many to overcome racism, gangsterism, and to walk in the way of Jesus Christ. I want others to understand the Jesus is the way and the truth. There are hope and a good future ahead in the body of Christ.
My heart goes out to abused women and children, who are currently living in poverty in the gang-infested Capeflats Colored Communities. It’s heartbreaking to even witness it. Young men have given up on hope for a good future. They think the only way to survive is to join gangsters. They need mentorship and guidance. So my vision and dream are to train them to overcome what they’re facing. Then, they can become well-equipped leaders and fishers of men with Biblical knowledge.
My Journey with God through Cancer
God became real to me when a few events occurred in my life. They were way beyond my control. I was diagnosed with cancer and given three months to live. I needed to continue with chemotherapy, which I felt almost caused my death. So, I refused to continue with the chemo treatment. I decided to fast and pray! Going to several hospitals asking them to REMOVE the tumor, all the hospitals refused to operate and suggested chemotherapy. I felt like they were forcing the issue, which left me even MORE DEVASTATED!
Eventually, the tumor ruptured, and I was rushed to the hospital. The surgeon there asked me whether I believed in God. She had heard I refused chemotherapy and blood transfusion.
Needless to say, I answered, “Yes of course!”
She gave me an ultimatum, “I’ll only do the operation on the condition that you agree to do radiation thereafter” I agreed.
After the operation, the surgeon told me that I’m a miracle because no trace of cancer was found spread in my body. I was misdiagnosed. Bear in mind that I walked for almost five years with a tumor that they refused to take out. Nevertheless, the radiation followed because I had made a promise to the surgeon. The only reason why she encouraged the radiation was to ensure that everything around the tumor was killed.
My Journey with God after the Operation
The radiation took 33 days. It was a very traumatic experience especially since my husband had committed suicide only over a week before my operation. I was totally shattered. I buried him one week before my operation. So, here I was alone in a foreign country. I basically left everything behind: my country, my family, my friends, and my church. I did it all for the sake of love. Therefore, now I SOLELY HAD TO RELY ON GOD.
What really humbled me and made me realize that I needed Christ now more than ever in my life was when I learned I would die in three months’ time. Then my mom suddenly died, and thereafter my husband “left” so suddenly. I felt abandoned, betrayed, and broken (my children are adults living their own lives in South Africa). I was left to fend for myself!
Giving up on life, I didn’t want to die. I cried, fasted, and prayed, singing gospel songs every day after my operation. That was the only thing I did. Then miraculously the Agape Love of God entered my heart. A love I never knew existed. God placed many Christians around me. They prayed, brought me food and clothes as my weight dropped (I had no food or money). I realized just how much God cares about me. I didn’t feel like an orphan anymore. Praise God!
My Childhood Journey with God
I had a very difficult childhood. Being born of mix-raced parents in a country where apartheid was still practiced, I never felt accepted anywhere. I didn’t fit into any groups. Sundays were my best days because my dad took me to church and I could wear my beautiful Sunday-dresses, my hat, pretty shoes, etc. It was a good feeling, but I didn’t learn much there because women had to remain silent. The best part was after church, my mom prepared a delicious lunch of pot-roasted chicken, potatoes, etc.
When I became a teenager, I left my church and started attending one of my school friend’s church. I enjoyed it very much because I could sing, dance, and clap my hands. No more women have to remain silent rules. It was great!
Since then I was church-hopping as the years went by trying to find God. Everywhere I attended there were different doctrines, religious beliefs, etc. Sometimes, I relocated to another city, village, or town. Then, I would always visit the local church and join. So, I had to start all over
again in a new church or congregation. However, I loved it. I met a lot of Christians along my journey up to the point that I immigrated to the Netherlands.
The Turning Point in My Journey with God
It was in my early thirties when I visited my local hairdresser Michelle who started ministering to me while styling my hair. I loved the way she ministered to me. So, she became my permanent hairdresser and close friend. Later, she took me with her to church and I was baptized in a swimming pool at the Pastor’s house.
A year or so later, God called me to join the worship team at the local church, walking distance from my home. While worshipping with the team, I could feel my love and trust for God growing more and more. There was an overwhelming yearning to draw much closer to God. I felt the Holy Spirit in my heart. My lifestyle changed, I became a new creation. It was a complete transformation happening to me! Suddenly, life had new meaning and I felt so full! The Bible became my favorite book!
For a period of ten years or so, I’ve been looking and asking around to find a Christian college for study. I approached several leaders in churches asking them for help. I was told to stay in the proof of the Lord. However, I kept on asking for information, but there were no funds available for me to attend a college. Because of rejection from others, I stopped going to church as well.
Finding a Free Online Christian College at CLI
It was then that the “COVID” pandemic hit the world. So, I started looking for FREE online Bible courses. It was then I came across the Christian Leaders Institute, a free online Christian college. I knew God answered my prayers. I was very excited and started studying immediately.
My desire is to continue with the Christian Leaders Institute, as it gives me the hope to fulfill my dream of building a church and community center to inspire others to do the same.
This free online Christian college is so important to me because I know that I am hungry for the Word of God. I am totally passionate about it and want to share my knowledge with others out there who might also be having the same desires and dreams without the necessary resources to do so.
I thank you for granting me this opportunity and wanting to invest in me as a vessel of God!!
Learn more about ordination at the Christian Leaders Alliance. Interested in a low-cost degree? Check out the CLI’s Leadership Excellence School.
My name is Dedra Jordan from the USA, and I am learning more about God at CLI. On December 14, 2017, my father passed away in my home. He was in Hospice care and ill for some time. I had some of my family there. As we all stood around my father before they took him away, I asked my cousin (a devout Christian) to say a prayer. We all joined hands and bowed our heads. My cousin began praying.
I felt LIKE I WAS SMACKED IN THE FACE. The Lord said to me, “It’s time for you to follow me.” And just like that, I wanted everything that had anything to do with Wicca out of my life. There was an urgency to get it away from me. I longed to be enveloped by the Lord’s grace and forgiveness and surrounded by Him.
Finding a Church Home
However, I felt at that time that I would be judged by those in the church. I felt judged by some in churches before. But my urgency to be in the congregation continued to grow. So, after a couple of months, both my husband and I decided that it was time to check out the church where my husband’s grandfather ministered. As soon as we walked in, I felt God’s enveloping love and acceptance that I longed for.
Since joining the church, I have never felt anything but that enveloping grace of our Lord and Savior. That feeling amplified this past May 28 when my mother passed away. As with my father, I cared for her as well. She too passed away in my home. I found that a church family is in more ways stronger than a biological one. Praise the Lord!
Service to God and Learning More about God at CLI
I started serving with the kids doing Bible crafts. However, the questions that they asked and how inquisitive they were made me wonder. I felt that there was more to my purpose. Was I to lead these kids toward Christ? I needed more knowledge and training. So I searched online. I found the Christian Leaders Institute for learning more about God, the Bible, and ministry. Thank you, CLI for this study opportunity!
Learn more about ordination at the Christian Leaders Alliance. Interested in a low-cost degree? Check out the CLI’s Leadership Excellence School.
I am Freddy J. Orosco from Peralta, New Mexico, USA, and I am studying the free Bible education online at CLI. I grew up in a Catholic family. I learned that if I didn’t follow the rules and standards of the Catholic Church that God wouldn’t bless me. My dad was a great provider, and my mom a great homemaker. In my early childhood, I attended catechism, was an altar boy, and attended church every Sunday with my parents.
In school, I struggled. I was easily distracted and unable to focus on the task at hand. Failure became my close friend. My parents grew up in a time where failure was ridiculed. I frequently heard phrases such as, ” You’ll never amount to anything,” or “All you’ll ever become is a ditch digger.” Growing up with my nephews and nieces and being the oldest by five years, I frequently heard that I was the oldest and the dumbest.
During my teenage years, I discovered I liked the effects of alcohol. I barely scraped by through High School. After high school, I gave following in my father’s footsteps a try in an attempt to win his approval. Once again, I failed.
Feeling God’s Call and a Jonah Moment
Despite my failings, ever since I can remember, I felt a tugging at my heart that God wanted to use me. There was some purpose He had for me in my life. I just could not fathom such a calling. After all, I failed at everything. Why would God want with such a failure as I?
At nineteen, I had a Jonah moment (one of many). I joined the Navy in one more attempt to win my dad’s approval since my dad was a veteran. While serving, I was introduced to racism, growing up in a small rural community in New Mexico; the color of one’s skin was never an issue. Aboard the ship, I was given the name wetback. I was also frequently hazed in ways that I find it difficult to mention.
Challenges
I drank more and more to escape the emotional pain and anguish from the frequent hazing. I served three and a half years before reaching a breaking point. My military career abruptly ended. Once again, I failed. My dad told me that I deserved what I got by joining the service and abandoning him and my mom.
I experienced frequent nightmares and episodes of anger to the point of rage. I had difficulty holding jobs, keeping friends, and relationships. My parents were done with me. They felt all I had to do was to get what I was experiencing out of my head, and all would be better. It didn’t happen that way.
Although there was a respite from alcohol in my first marriage, there was still the untreated mental and emotional issues. After three years, the marriage ended bitterly.
Feeling God’s Call and Another Jonah Response
I continued to feel the tugging in my heart that God was calling me. Once again, I ran like Jonah. I ran to Arizona from New Mexico then back to New Mexico. I ran to witchcraft, to fortune-telling, to alcohol, to cocaine, to my second wife, and methamphetamine. My second marriage was a five-year meth party that ended up in another Jonah moment.
San Antonio, Texas, was my destination this time. It was 2004. The next eight years were like a roller coaster ride. There were passing attempts at getting my life straight, failed relationships, lost jobs, and addiction. I never had any real control over my situation.
Growth
In 2012, my dad had a heart attack. I had a major breakdown and a stay at the VA hospital in San Antonio. While there, I expressed my desire to better my relationship with God. A nurse at the VA suggested a local church. It had a great recovery ministry in addition to many opportunities to serve.
For the next three years, I went through two recovery programs the church had. I served at the church in audio and visual ministry, all while pursuing an associate’s degree in music. One thing was missing, not that it wasn’t available. I was not feeding my spiritual hunger with God’s Word. I still had the idea that just doing good would fix everything. However, it didn’t. It was nothing more than a temporary fix for a long term problem.
Rock Bottom Rescue
I found myself at the losing end of life’s playing field. I found a quick temporary fix that led me to crack cocaine. This run lasted about eight months before I hit rock bottom. One morning in mid-March of 2016, I was drug sick, hungry, and ashamed. I didn’t want to live the life I was living. Also, I didn’t want to face the daylight or anyone bringing any kind of hope.
A family member I hadn’t seen for some time knocked on my door. I ignored the knocking, but the more I ignored it, the louder it got. Finally, I answered. The first words out of my family member’s mouth, “I had a feeling that if I don’t get you out of here immediately that you won’t live another two weeks. Pack a few things; you are leaving on a bus to Raton, New Mexico in the morning.” I had a friend I went to school with that lived in Raton at the time.
I fumbled around the mess my apartment was and gathered a few clothes. My life was starting over. The bus ride was a nightmare. It was worse than any experience I had ever had before in my time doing drugs. I was physically sick from cocaine. I got to Raton. Where I stayed, I was isolated from the outside world.
New Direction
For a week, I slept. Then, in an instant, I woke up and felt that tugging in my heart once again. It was even stronger than before. It felt like God was telling me that the time is now for me to start serving His purpose. I had to quit running and face my demons with God’s help. It became apparent surrender was imminent. My knees hit the floor and gave my life to God. Life became real, and something was different. I relied on the comfort of God’s Word more and more.
Back in 2012, I was finally diagnosed with significant PTSD. My dad survived his heart attack but had the onset of dementia. My mom, my dad, and I came to the point of forgiveness for the years of hurt we caused each other. It happened before my dad’s dementia took him completely. My mom had to take care of him alone. God provided the resources for me to fly from San Antonio to Albuquerque for summer, spring, and winter breaks from college.
New Life and Free Bible Education Online at CLI
Ending up in Raton was the beginning of a fantastic walk with the Lord through the help the Lord provided. Being spiritually fed by His word, I am fully restored. Through God’s grace and mercy, I have a beautiful family, a wonderful Godly wife, two special daughters, two sons-in-law, and a beautiful grandson. Sometimes, where we think our testimony ends, it begins.
Now I am studying the free Bible education online at the Christian Leaders Institute to strengthen my walk with God and prepare for the ministry God calls me to do. Wherever God leads and whatever God wants me to do, I will be equipped with the online Bible education at CLI.
Learn more about ordination at the Christian Leaders Alliance. Interested in a low-cost degree? Check out the CLI’s Leadership Excellence School.