My name is Patrick Lawrence Henry. I am born again, through our Lord Jesus Christ, since July 19, 2016. Now, three months later, I publicly proclaim my Faith in our Lord Jesus Christ. Having not fully realized what had happened to me, has been a great blessing to me and our marriage. Please allow me to explain.
Bonnie, my wife of five years, and myself have been in marital counseling for over one year. Our marriage has been difficult from the beginning. In 2012 I was diagnosed with Complex PTSD. Since birth I have had over thirty separate traumas, also abandonment and neglect. There’s no sense in going into all the gory details since its only perception anyways. Moreover, its my marriage and wife, that sustained and humbled me. Its Bonnie’s walk with the Lord, praise God.
I’ve been around Church, in Muskegon County Michigan, since I was a small boy. A school bus would gather me and my siblings for Sunday School and Church. We grew up in a Christian Reformed Church, also my brothers and I were involved in Musk-O-Tawa Cadet Corps. Religion studies wasn’t important at that time, but being around Christians was. I never found Jesus and he always loved me. That first Church probably saved my life. Five more Churches followed, I searched all my life. It was the seed that was needed, to continue, to try and find Jesus.
I met Bonnie January of 2009, and married in July 2011. I have four children, from a previous marriage and Bonnie has two. We have both been married twice before, which is why I tried in this marriage. After a PTSD trigger I began to disintegrate and in two years, Suicidal Ideation was the final result. In-patient hospitalization came in May, 2015, followed by two weeks of Out-patient care. Communication was difficult because neither Bonnie or I knew what was going on during recovery. We were both overwhelmed by the scope of PTSD and the recovery from same. Our counselor is a very good marriage teacher, and also a very Godly woman. Its been a privilege to learn from her.
July 19, 2016, after a revelation, at approximately four thirty in the morning I fell asleep. The revelation was” Patrick after you ran away from home at age sixteen, you gave up the right to be a victim.”
When I woke, five hours later, I was overflowing with Glory. Jesus, prepared me. I gave thanks soon after. I, became redeemed but I did not know. For three weeks, we lived in glory overflowing even to the children. Then Bonnie got confused and needed discernment. That knocked me off my cloud and that made me angry. I fell too. Fortunately, counseling brought us back together. I repented soon after and Bonnie followed shortly after that. That’s why I mentioned Bonnie so soon in my testimony. I know she’s not responsible.
During this short time, I had two revelations. The first was that I had been redeemed. Sanctification was in progress. I was able to look back a month and a half and know that I had been forgiven. The second was that Bonnie had been filled with Glory. Only Christians, will allow that. I had thought that through our entire marriage I had been the Christian. I wasn’t disappointed, not at all, actually relieved. God had provided the church, trained the Pastor, so he had done his part. I was grateful that at least one of us had done are part. After this revelation our marriage became honorable. Thank you, Father.
Now that I’m alive, I have a decision to make. Being an empty vessel, free of loss and grief, I can fill the recently emptied forgiven heart, with Gods unending love. Study at CLI will fill me appropriately. My mission, should I be willing to except it, is to develop a way to, inform as many people as possible, about Developmental PTSD. Hundreds of millions of people worldwide suffer from this curable disorder. The only thing in the way is ignorance, and that can be conquered. Pray for a conquering spirit.
One of the things that amazes me the most is the effortless evangelism that I am capable of now. Knowing this I can’t wait till I have enough knowledge to back it up. Glory be to God.
I pray that our relationship is so precious to God, that he blesses us for all our days.
Thank you for your service, Patrick Henry